poo.pee.tantrums.tears.laughter.going insane.

Friday, July 17, 2009

No no No No no....

I am determined to have a life. One that is full of zest, adventure and new experiences. I am not about to sit on my fat ass all day and watch the world go by. RECLAIM! RECLAIM!

No no no its not about eating in fancy restaurants, its about accumulating and learning from new people, places, sights and smells. Food for the soul is all about things in life that will make you wiser and deeper. I won't want to spend my time on earth just hoarding and buying material things. I want to built a life time of memories that I can bring with me everywhere that I go.

Yes, Louboutins would be nice but what good would Louboutins do if you didn't know Louboutins were!!! that is my point! I want my sum to be complexly rich.

It's kind of hard to put into words how I visualise the end of me. But it has to be without regrets and it's paramount that I have done all I can to make sure I didn't live an existence of NULL. My life has to mean something and it has to have meant something to people. No! I don't want to change the world or save the world from poverty. Rather I need to make sense of the world....this crazy world that we live in.

Sorry for the philosophical entry but sometimes humans need more than just sustenance and love. We as a race have been reduced to literally nothing. The useless pursuits of things that define us are all being looked for in the wrong places and I really wonder if anyone feels the same way as I do.

Yes yes no man is an island and society is to be blamed for everything.

I am a functionalist. I honestly believe that everything has a function or it will cease to exist. Same goes for humans. So what is the function of humans??? or rather the common Joe, people like me and you and millions out there. Do we function and exist to seek and learn or do we exist to function? But what function? that is my quest!! But seek and learn what? How to live within social norms and how to conform to what others do? This is really bugging the hell out of me. But if this is the case than life is really rather pointless. The older I get the more disturbing it has become. No! I don't want to study why people do the things they do and behave the they do. I need the simple answer to human existence!

Maybe I should pack my bags and go into the remote mountains of Tibet to find the true meaning of life. Or I could trek into the depths of the Himalayas and seek the truth. I doubt I will find anything there because the meaning and truth is what you make it and I seriously think it lies within each and everyone of us.

How I am going to retrieve that I am still trying to figure out...this is my void in life and maybe the answer is flux! constant change and new experiences. Maybe its my inquisitive nature that is always looking for answers to questions that have plagued mankind for thousands of years. So if I wasn't so free and kaypoh I won't be thinking about things like that...........

Hmmm.....so if you think have even the slightest clue what I am trying to say here...I say call me and we will have a discourse on how to figure this out. I wished I could have written this better but my state of mind at the moment doesn't really allow me to further organise my thoughts in any other way. I seemed to be having a clog somewhere in my schemata.

I have given it much thought, the existence of a higher being still doesn't answer my question of the basis of human existence and its purpose. Religion so far hasn't offered me the answer, it gives answers to what we should do and where we will go after we are done here. But it some how doesn't tell us why we are here.....hmmm....maybe I missed out a few pages. Maybe its this continuity thing that is common theme, we never really disappear and that the soul lives forever. Maybe the idea of eternity is wat bugs me????

I will leave it for now. I am going to take a break from myself.

Cheers and out!

5 comments:

Unknown said...

I'm sure all of us have some difficulty grasping the very essence of our being. However, we can also choose to see the world and our existence in the most complicated way or we can see it in the simplest. I choose to see my existence as a gift from God, that I'm here on earth to bless and to be blessed. As a Christian, I won't say that I'm the most pious thing ever (definitely NOT!), and I'm not the bible basher, read-bible-more-pray-more preachy, preachy type either. But I feel secure in the fact that I believe that God is real, and at the end of my journey here, I will go to a better place with Him. However, while I'm here, I can only hope to see each day as an opportunity to do my best as a human being. To love, to share, to learn, to grow...and because of the fact that I'm imperfect, I have so much more to embrace and learn from others and from God. I think life is about loving, growing and learning. No amount of riches or worldly goods can give you that. It's something you choose to have and to give. I hope you find your way too, and see your world beyond what ties you down and gets you in such philosophical moods :) Forget about Tibet...you'll just be missing Pongz and Letitia too much to find your 'true meaning'.

Time for A Wooden Tigress said...

"Be a light unto yourself" - no two journeys are the same, there will be times where kindreds share our paths, and there will be times, when our poverty is our wealth, and solitude, our company. Kekeke, bring on the wine, and this fellow babbler will join you in spewing crap, haha.

Hakuin once wrote in a letter to one of his students, Kokan:

[Quote]:

One day in Mino province, I observed a cicada casting its skin in the shade. It managed to get its head free, and then its hands and its feet emerged one after the other. Only its left wing remained inside, still caught to the old skin. It didn’t look as though it would ever get that wing unstuck. Watching it struggling to free itself, I was moved by feelings of pity to assist it with my fingernail.

Excellent, I thought, now you are free to go on your way. But the wing that I had touched remained shut and would not open. That cicada never was able to fly as it should have.

Looking at it, I felt ashamed of myself and regretted deeply what I had done. When you think about it, present day Zen teachers act in much the same way when they guide their students. I’ve seen and heard how they take young people of exceptional talent — those destined to become the very pillars and ridgepoles of our school — and with their ill-advised and inopportune methods end up making them into something half-baked and unachieved.

[Unquote]

Listen to your heart, and when it has spoken, walk in its direction ... The most important thing is really about seeking the truth and being honest to ourselves. We are all creatures of light, although, it may take some, many journeys to find that light.

Some walk barefooted, others run with Nike, some cat-walk with Louboutins, while others flip in Crocs. The journey is yours to make :p

Crazy Mum aka Ivy Ong said...

WAH! geeshhhh....you guys are lagi more deep than me...i need time to digest. Will return with a come back soon.

Carrie said...

I think you just have cabin fever...

Crazy Mum aka Ivy Ong said...

no la carrie really....this has been bugging me for years. its not cabin fever...life has to be more than eat, sleep, do good deeds, have friends and children, spent time with family, find a job and earn some dough, find a hobby, do a course, learn something new. After all these WHAT? make more money? make more friends? have more children? find new hobby? hmmmmmmmm............