Having the life you want is not impossible. It's very much like building a house lots of time, effort, cement and knowing what you want. Most happy people did not get to where they are by luck. It's was a journey of careful planning, taking calculated risk, learning from mistakes and some brain.
When you look for that dream house you start by looking for a suitable location very much like how you search for that special someone to spent the rest of your life with. You have some idea what you want but you never really know until see it/him/her.
After you found something suitable you lay the foundations and make sure they are strong and steady as a rock or your house will come tumbling down. You make sure that you have common values with regards to children and their up bringing, similar family values even religious and financial goals. A failure to come to terms with core values is like building a house with only 80% of the foundation in place. Not doomed for complete failure but lots of work, effort and time will be required to patch falling pieces along the way.
Once you get that house up you fill it up with things that you love and make it a home. Very much like the rest of your life, you fill it up with people you care about, people that are positive and of good character. But you also learn to let go and eradicate people that are bad for you no matter how painful. You will find if you surround yourself with people and things that you love. You will in return feel loved.
Fundamentally it's all about knowing what you want and not settling for anything less. If you haven't figured out what you want in life maybe it's time you started thinking about what will make you jump out of bed with a smile on face so that everyday will be the best day of your life. You create it one small step at a time, it may take years and sometimes you fall or take a few steps back. But you keep looking forward and you do whatever it takes to build that life that you envision in your mind. You remove obstacles, by pass them or take a detour but you never never look back.
Finally, you do it alone if you have to, you are the sole driving force to creating that life. There is no perfect life there will still be ups and downs, trials and tribulations. But you deal with it one at time and move on, staying focused on your final destination.
It may seem a little over simplified but it's not about money or having the best job or living in the best district. It's about being true to yourself and knowing that you have taken every EFFORT to make your life worth living.
People will beat you down, creeps will come into your life and suck you dry. Toilets will leak, cars will break down and children will fall sick. You cannot control what happens neither can you change the world or your neighbour but you can choose how you react to them and you can choose what you want to do about it. Remember that when you are in control of yourself, you will be in control of your life. Suddenly the world seems a better place.
This was written for a dear friend that is feeling rather down at the moment. Hope this helps you out of your darkness.